Why Is Parenting During The Christmas Season Harder?

For years I had been trying to teach my children humility and to think of others first. I realized after so much hard work, in constantly pointing out when they were being selfish, that they resolved in to trying to manipulate my perception of their humility. Some people call this “modified behavior”.  Yes, around Christmas time this was in full evidence, and pretty much anytime I stepped into their rooms while they were playing together. The name calling and the non existent sharing of toys ceased and something that sounded like “humility” to anyone but this parent listening, would begin. However, I desperately wanted heart transformation not modified behavior for my children and all I could do was enter my prayer closet and ask God for wisdom.

It seems like anytime I talk to God about my children’s behavior, He speaks about what it is like “fathering” me. Amazingly (unlike I react to my kids), He didn’t point out my selfishness, nor did he bring up my pride. Instead He reminded me of His righteousness (Greek definition: “Divine Approval”) that was given to me through Jesus Christ. He reminded me it is not my job to work hard for me to bear fruit but to abide in the vine which naturally bears fruit. He makes it so easy to abide in Jesus because there is unconditional love. We all desire character for our children but if it only comes from us then it’s guaranteed to fade when we are away. Please don’t misunderstand me,  We as parents discipline our children for their bad decisions because they need that from us, but we continually point them to the forgiveness and the unconditional love of Jesus.

My responsibility as a parent is to point my children to Jesus and who they are in Him and they will abide in Him and bear fruit even when I am not around and it’s not Christmas season.

The One Thing Never to Have “Balance” in Your Parenting.

Right now in the American culture, the effort of the day is “balance”. Children should have a “balanced” breakfast. Parents should have a “balanced” schedule. Everyone should “balance” their checkbook (wait do those still exist?). My point is that everyone is looking for a way to be balanced in every area of their life and sometimes there is a lot of guilt when things get crazy with raising children and life. Question is, “Does our Father God stay balanced in every area of raising His children?” Of course He does, right? No, there is one thing He does for His children that is so overwhelming and absolutely not balanced.

God is extremely imbalanced when it comes to loving His kids. His love is so extremely lopsided, that He would allow Jesus’ back to be whipped and tore open for His kids’ health. He would take every sin of the world and place it on Jesus to be judged on a cross. He buried His son so that death and separation from God would be defeated. Then He raised His son to life to be our advocate in Heaven so that His children can no longer be accused by enemies before God in Heaven.  Jesus was forsaken by God so that we would never be forsaken and chose to fill us with His Spirit, who will never leave us for eternity. This kind of love is so imbalanced that only by the thought of losing your own child and what you would do to return them, do you possibly catch a glimpse of what the Father has done to have a relationship with His children.

Romans 8:31-37 (NLT) says,  If God is for us, who can ever be against us? Since he did not spare even his own Son but gave him up for us all, won’t he also give us everything else? Who dares accuse us whom God has chosen for his own? No one—for God himself has given us right standing with himself. Who then will condemn us? No one—for Christ Jesus died for us and was raised to life for us, and he is sitting in the place of honor at God’s right hand, pleading for us. Can anything ever separate us from Christ’s love? Does it mean he no longer loves us if we have trouble or calamity, or are persecuted, or hungry, or destitute, or in danger, or threatened with death? As the Scriptures say, “For your sake we are killed every day; we are being slaughtered like sheep.” No, despite all these things, overwhelming victory is ours through Christ, who loved us.And I am convinced that nothing can ever separate us from God’s love.

Love is never balanced with God when it comes to His children and it should never be for our kids either!