For years I had been trying to teach my children humility and to think of others first. I realized after so much hard work, in constantly pointing out when they were being selfish, that they resolved in to trying to manipulate my perception of their humility. Some people call this “modified behavior”. Yes, around Christmas time this was in full evidence, and pretty much anytime I stepped into their rooms while they were playing together. The name calling and the non existent sharing of toys ceased and something that sounded like “humility” to anyone but this parent listening, would begin. However, I desperately wanted heart transformation not modified behavior for my children and all I could do was enter my prayer closet and ask God for wisdom.
It seems like anytime I talk to God about my children’s behavior, He speaks about what it is like “fathering” me. Amazingly (unlike I react to my kids), He didn’t point out my selfishness, nor did he bring up my pride. Instead He reminded me of His righteousness (Greek definition: “Divine Approval”) that was given to me through Jesus Christ. He reminded me it is not my job to work hard for me to bear fruit but to abide in the vine which naturally bears fruit. He makes it so easy to abide in Jesus because there is unconditional love. We all desire character for our children but if it only comes from us then it’s guaranteed to fade when we are away. Please don’t misunderstand me, We as parents discipline our children for their bad decisions because they need that from us, but we continually point them to the forgiveness and the unconditional love of Jesus.
My responsibility as a parent is to point my children to Jesus and who they are in Him and they will abide in Him and bear fruit even when I am not around and it’s not Christmas season.